Saturday, October 15, 2011


WOW, what an amazing journey I had over the past two months. I began training for my new position as a children's social worker near the end of August and now, training is finished and I am expected to assume the role as a social worker. Reflecting on the countless presentations, training modules, policy reviews and subject evaluations, I still feel unprepared. I'll admit that I am prepared academically, obtaining all the wisdom I can from the countless articles, books, policies, manuals and training materials but psychologically or even physically, I am still in the nebulous zone of unfamiliarity. The ideal state for training is stability, normal life experiences and infrequent encounters with crises or abrupt changes in our homeostasis.

However, these past months, I have experienced the lawful injustices of our legal system, tension and stress, familial problems, the chaotic, sometime neurotic experiences with my former ex-girlfriend and financial burdens that even President Obama could not save me from, no offense. I also experienced the addition of two strong new members on my cheerleading squad, which enabled me to endure this torturous blowback from life. The jocundity of these two members, anchored me during stormy waters, navigated me through perilous nights and their warmth infected my soul with a growing passion to thrive amidst the dry soil. So, with all this in the back of my mind, it was rather difficult to focus solely on my training. More importantly the anxiety of losing my position due to my legal difficulties occupied most of my mind.  In light of this, I was blessed by God himself, to remain steadfast in my pursuit to conquer my dreams and continue my uphill battle to glory. My faith has been the only source of strength and refuge: it it was not for my faith, hope would have remained unwelcomed.

During the beginning of this month, I have made significant changes to my life. These changes were an opportunity to rectify or at least, alter my state of being. My mother moved out, I finally left my girlfriend for good, and I am trying my best to reach some financial stability. Working without these two relational stresses gives me more perspicuity rather than perception. My first week as a social worker not in training was relaxed and I have not inherited cases yet. However, I am told I might get a full case load, meaning 38 children to care for. I am anxious to start working with live clients and put in practice what I absorbed in my MSW curriculum, DCFS internship and my DCFS training. I leave this entry with a quote I stumbled on unconsciously:

            When life wants to throw wrenches, ask for the nuts and bolts!

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